We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize