Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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