Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize