Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
