I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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