Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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