I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
