Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
