'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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