Ketchup is God's man juice
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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