The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
now i know why i became what i already was.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
