Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize