I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
