i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
