Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(480): View more from Arizona

get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch

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(353): View more from

I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number

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(843): View more from South Carolina

I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month

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(609): View more from New Jersey

That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets

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(517): View more from Michigan

New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause

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(810): View more from Michigan

I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie

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(347): View more from New York

Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings

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