i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
