One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
