Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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