He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
