i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
