you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
