I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
You ate ashes out of my bong
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
