Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
