Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize