THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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