is this the sara with the beer cane?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
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