i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
