So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I'm just crazy horny about you
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
