so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
