also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize