that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
