Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
