if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize