I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
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