He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
It's just like the Real World with babies
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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