doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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