You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
