all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
