when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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