Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize