im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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