yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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