Where is the hickey?
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize