yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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