i don't like sucking hair
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Just high enough for therapy.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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