Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
