At least make sure they are 18
Why
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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