Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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