Sponge bath it is.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
