What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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