i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize
