you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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