uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
