and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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